Your 15 Month Old, from babycenter.com

Guess who turned 15 months old today? I confess, not paying any attention to the date, I thought this “big milestone” was to occur on Monday. That is when his check up with the pediatrician is. Oops! Well, I guess we’ll have his vital stats on Monday, for now, let’s see where he stacks up developmentally…

New this month: Moving forward
Every day you watch your toddler attempt and accomplish something new, but the 15th month is one that pediatricians and developmental experts consider a "milestone" period. Most babies (around 90 percent) are walking now, and it may seem like with her first steps your baby walked right out of babyhood. (I think Kevin would agree with me, Harry never seemed like a baby. He was born a little kid.) Suddenly she wants to sit at the dinner table (please refer to Harry’s World photo of him in his throne) — or stand on a chair at the table — instead of in her highchair (he is so far very happy in his high chair. I think it makes him feel like a big kid, actually), she wants to talk on the telephone (as anyone who has ever met him knows! - but it’s been that way for MANY months now), push the vacuum cleaner (I don’t think Harry has ever seen a vacuum cleaner), anything she can do to help you. Even if she's not totally confident on her feet, she's still very keen to experiment with different ways of moving: climbing, trotting, running, jumping, and ... dawdling. Harry kicks butt on the stairs! I have big rock climbing ambitions for him. Menike refers these happenings as “monkey see, monkey do,” but as of late, Sponge Harry has really started copying everything we do. He tries to put Kevin’s wallet in his usually non-existent back pocket. After a couple of days of watching me put make-up on, he decided coloring his face with marker was a good idea. And I am going to positively dehydrate if he takes one more water bottle away from me!

Shopping and marketing can be challenging during these early stages of toddlerhood, since your mini-explorer is much too curious to be strapped into a grocery cart or stroller (Harry didn’t like his stroller when he was little. He loves it now. I would go so far as to say he is obsessed. But he also enjoys exploring. This behavior is usually reinforced by the free gifts salespeople give him) — she'd much rather stand or walk. (Some babies this age are more content to ride in a backpack.) She also wants to pull things off of shelves and then try to carry the objects while she walks around. While this can be frustrating for you, she's not intentionally trying to cause trouble — she's just putting her new physical skills to the test. (Luckily, Harry is at school playing with his friends during the day, so he is not usually stuck running errands and food shopping).

What you can do
If your baby is walking with confidence, it won't take much encouragement from you to get her to take some bigger steps. For a safe, fun outing, get a large lightweight ball, like a beach ball, and head to a grassy place where there's a gentle slope. Toss the ball up the hill and then when it rolls back toward you, show your toddler how to catch it. She may not catch it very often, but she will have a great time trying to chase it down. (Harry is a fairly good catcher. This sounds like a fun activity though. No idea where we will find a hill in Alexandria though).

If your toddler is still wobbly on her feet, she may enjoy pushing around an activity walker toy. She'll soon build up the confidence to walk freely on her own.

Other developments: Busy hands
Keys, pencils, lipsticks, a watch, anything you have in your wallet: All are likely to be fascinating to your toddler. (OH YEAH!!!) Not just because they're fun to look at, but because she sees you using such objects and she wants to do the same. The problem is, you might not want her trying on your lipstick! (Hence, the marker). Your challenge is to find ways to satisfy her need to mimic the things she sees you do, but safely. Consider getting her a set of plastic keys all her own. (Oh, okay! What kid does that work for?) You can also give her an old purse of yours and put in a hairbrush and comb, and maybe an old wallet. (He’s already got the old cell phones).

There are plenty of other ways to keep your toddler's hands occupied for more than a minute or two. For example, fill a laundry basket with odds and ends, such as plastic containers and lids, paper towel or toilet paper cores, empty cereal boxes (with plastic liners removed), and so on. She'll love getting her hands on — and trying to figure out how to use — objects that look like they have a purpose. (Nah, I prefer expensive toys that serve the same purpose. I think they are nicer for me to look at. Who wants to look at garbage tossed around their living room?)

New this month: Pay attention to meeeee!
(That’s new?) Whirlwind. It's a word that aptly describes a typical 15-month-old, and life with a toddler this age is never dull. His attention is equally divided between his toys and you. Children thrive on their parents' attention, and if you happen to leave the area where he's playing, he'll come looking for you within a few minutes (if we are lucky) because he wants to know that you're paying attention to him. "See! See!" is probably a common refrain in your house as your child tries to balance his drive to be more independent with his need to know he can depend on you.

Until now, your toddler has been preoccupied with checking out his surroundings and the objects in his world. Now he's just as curious about the effects of his behavior on other people (Harry has always been more interested in people than things…of course, now he is into reactions, such as what happens if he clocks you in the head with a cordless phone. He is usually very pleased with the response. Dimples and everything. I am told that there is not an emotional connection here. He is not happy to have hurt you, he is happy that he caused an effect), and his connection with you is vital to his confidence. During this period of social exploration you may see him trying to get your attention anyway he can. He'll shout, imitate gestures he sees you and other adults making, pinch, poke, shove, whine, and cry, all in an attempt to see how you react, and what it takes for him to get what he wants. He will quickly realize that various behaviors get different results from the adults who surround him. He may learn that he gets what he wants faster if he laughs instead of whines. Or that whining will get him what he wants from his grandfather (PopPop, are you listening???), but not from his mom or dad. This experimentation is all part of socialization, and if you are consistent with enforcing limits, he'll soon learn which behaviors are acceptable and which aren't. (I am a sucker for the dimples though. Luckily, I am not the bad cop).

What you can do
The wilder things your child does to maintain his connection with you and your attention on him may be more annoying and frustrating for you than for your toddler. Really listening when your toddler is trying to tell you something and giving him as much attention as you can may head off a great deal of whining and screaming, but when you've reached your limit you may simply need to remove yourself from the room. Put your toddler in his crib or playpen and step out for a few minutes, take a few deep breaths, and take a moment to remind yourself that he's going through a phase.

Consider getting involved in a playgroup that includes some children who are slightly older than yours. Preschool-age children are capable of engaging their younger friends in pretend play, and yours may enjoy being with kids who are willing to take a "leadership" role in play (Harry much prefers older kids, aged 3-5. I do too. They play very well together. Playing with 1 or 2 year olds can be challenging, especially when those kids are, um, not the best behaved. Luckily, the ones he plays with the most usually are. Those kids don’t push him off of his slide or throw sand in his face. His favorite kids are probably the nephew at daycare, Solan, and Dominic and Isabella. Isabella is only two, but she is used to older kids. I think she is also intrigue by Harry. He’s her pet). Playing with a mixed-age group can also be a great way for the younger ones to learn about cooperation.

If your child is reluctant to let you out of his sight, a small group of two or three children who are your child's same age will probably suit your toddler best, and once he's gotten used to "playing" with one or two other children his own age, it will be easier for him to be away from you.

Other developments: A budding sense of humor, Mom vs. Dad, and nightmares
Everyone loves a clown, and your 15-month-old already realizes this. Once he recognizes that a certain behavior — dancing, crawling like a baby, doing somersaults — gets a positive response from you, he'll do it over and over not just because he can, but because he loves to be the center of attention. After a silly dance performance, for instance, he'll look around the room just to see what kind of effect his moves have had on the audience, and if he has everyone's attention, he'll offer an encore.

Don't be surprised if your toddler already seems to treat you and your spouse differently. Whichever parent he spends the most time with will be the one he demands more of and is hardest on. (I think this must be Kevin. Poor Kevin doesn’t get as many grins and giggles…but I think that Kevin is who Harry goes to when he is sleepy or if he falls and gets hurt). If Mom's around more, Dad will be treated like someone special, and vice versa. While this may make one of you feel jealous, know that it's normal and is your child's way of testing out his relationship with each of you. Family dynamics, and your child's shifting loyalties (they totally shift! He’s very fair weather, not unlike Bailey), will be more and more evident during the next few months as he becomes increasingly independent.

Finally, as toddlers begin to experiment with imaginative play, they also sometimes start to have nightmares. A 15-month-old is reaching an age where he can start to think on a symbolic level and is able to transform reality into fantasy (not that he could explain this to you!). It will be several years before your child can distinguish between dreams and reality. Since he probably can't use words to tell you about his dreams, you'll have to rely on unusual behaviors to alert you. Children who are stressed or anxious (usually related to tension in the family or problems with daycare or preschool) are prone to nightmares (Isabella had several nightmares about snakes after coming in contact with a plastic one. Harry wakes up at the end of his REM cycles. I am convinced it is because of bad dreams). If your usually sound sleeper awakens crying in the night and can't tell you why he's upset, try talking to him in a soothing voice and rubbing his back until he settles down (thanks for the advice, she says sarcastically).

At this age, all you can do is comfort your child and perhaps establish some sort of routine to banish the "monsters" from his room. The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests reading your toddler some stories about dreams and sleep, such as In the Night Kitchen, by Maurice Sendak, to help him understand that they're nothing to be afraid of. (I think we’ll just watch Monsters, Inc, and do lots of Scary Feet to get rid of them…and get a quad workout in the process!).

Sometimes these things are useful. This one, not so much. Ah well.

I am not as competitive about Harry’s milestones as I used to be. I guess I can say that, since he is usually textbook on so many of them. Anything he is advanced on, I’d have to say is most likely just from being around the other kids at daycare. Solan, of course, is the coolest. He is three, and Harry is so excited on the days he is there. He goes to pre-school now, so it is usually just afternoons or off days. Reenie and the other little girl are just part timers. They seem to get along well. Both are two. They usually hang out with Susanna. She is also two. The girls are very cute these days. They hang out together in their little dresses and swing. Interesting that the boys and girls already seem to have segregated themselves to some extent. Sid/Sage/whatever his name is (I really should email someone about what these kids names are. It is hard to understand Menike’s accent sometimes.) and Susanna are full timers like Harry. They seem comfortable being the regulars. This also means that they either seem to be kind of ignoring each other or annoying each other. I figure it is because they are always together. The boys seem to do more active things, while the girls can stay in one place. Now that I am writing this, I am only just realizing it. For the short periods of time that I am there with them, it seems like the boys cover more area.

Harry is still working on his coloring. He also uses paper, not just his face. He likes to climb around on the playground equipment at Menike’s. He likes to hang out in the blanket cabinet in his room and play peekabo. And he loves long rides in his stroller or on his bike. And straw cups.

He dislikes cottage cheese. He dislikes being told “No.” He dislikes having to play inside during the day. And he hates being stuck in his car seat for more than 2.5 hours. I hope we can convince him to like DVDs again before our 6 hour drive to Duck!