Nap Time!

Does passing out after crying for an hour still count as napping?
Do you think Harry picks up on the fact that I hated napping, and still find it a waste of time?
Maybe that is why he keeps saying apple over an over. He is trying to tell me the apple doesn't fall far from the tree!

School resumes January 3rd!
And Whole Foods opens on Duke Street January 17th!

Coming up next: my 3 day adventure with Harry!

Making the best of a bad thing...
(Also subtitled: the continuing saga of my disdain for "The Holidays")

Please note:
This is a VERY long-winded rant by yours truly about a really stupid situation that got decidedly worse this weekend. If you prefer very long stories, that hardly effect you in any way, please read on. If not, don’t torture yourself.

As if we all don't bring enough "bad energy" upon ourselves around this time of year, what with all of the shopping with money we don't really have, the long-thought considerations if what to get for people we don't really know, struggling to spend "quality" time with people we don't really want to see, coupled with the lack of time in the ever-shortening daylight sun (okay, technically we're beyond the solstice and the days are actually getting longer again, but certainly not fast enough), to say makes for stressful times, may well be the understatement of the year.

Add to all of this, when some of said people we don’t' really want to see, decide that this is a perfect opportunity to push their own agenda. When they seem to think that now, of all times, is the best time to "stick to their guns" and do their own thing.

Over the last several years, we've made concerted efforts on many occasions to make it to see as many people as we can on each trip north. Specifically, at this time of year, we seem to have our hands most full. It's enough that we have so many people that we actually do want to see that are scattered all over the Philadelphia Metro area, add to that a precocious toddler and a particularly unwelcome canine, and itineraries can get dicey, to say the least.

This year we decided to, perhaps against better judgment, crunch our holiday running-around into a two-day affair. We made it known quite some time ago, and reiterated over the Turkey-day holiday, that Kim would prefer to not spend her birthday trapped in the car, crawling north on I-95. Personally, I had hoped to dodge the drive altogether, but the compromise was to leave VA on Xmas eve morning, head to West Chester for Shrimpfest (7 not 5... OOPS), and then over to NJ on the 25th for a pinball-type affair trying to see everyone on that side of the river before heading home around 7pm.

Oh yes... all the while, finding a place for the aforementioned Regal Beagle to spend Christmas Vacation, and keeping Young Harry (you remember Harry? There’s a website around here about Harry) entertained, well-rested, and fed.

So go figure, Kim the world traveler has put together a relatively realistic itinerary for the weekend, in which we actually had some wiggle-time, and overall, not too much time in the car. All is well... until the sticky guns decide to rear their ugly heads.

There's nothing worse than when someone you're not allowed to distance yourself from, by virtue of blood relations, decides making not only an ass of themselves (again), and an absolute mess of what has historically been a relatively fun occasion. Now I know there are myriad of discussions of the state of, importance of, detriment of, direct effects of (etc... etc... etc) sibling rivalries, but by definition, doesn't a rivalry need to be recognized by both sides?

For those of you new to the situation, a few quick notes: Kim is an only child. I've got an older bother by 3 years, and a younger sister by 6 years. Meghan and I have what I'd like to consider a pretty solid relationship, as she also seems to have with Kim... which is nice. To say that my relationship with Bryan is strained, would be putting things politely... VERY politely. As well, both of my parents have remarried since their divorce, Kim's father remains single, and her mother has remarried. Now back to the story...

So back to our travel schedule... the plan is -- up at the crack o' dawn with young Harry, whip up a batch of blueberry pancakes for nourishment, everyone dressed and in the car, drop off the pup at Positive Playcare, and head North to PA to spend the afternoon in West Chester prepping for Shrimp. Touch base with some friends at the park, eat some seafood and such, make Meghan watch "It's a Wonderful Life" finally for the first time, and get some rest. once again, up at the crack o' dawn, head East to NJ for breakfast at Pop-Pop's, over to see Kim's cousins & godparents, to Kim's Mom's, to the firehouse, to see Melina's new house, then to Shelly's for dinner, Harry into his PJ's, then head South to sleep at home that night.

While it may sound intimidating, take it from me... this was a GREAT plan.

I took the 23rd off so Kim and I could spend her birthday together on a date-day (nights never seem to work out that much, although we DID make it to Tara's for dinner on the 22nd!). Harry off to school for his last day, haircut for me, some cleanup around the house, catch the matinee of Harry Potter (great flick, even without having read past the first book), pick up little man, pick up a nice dinner & desert at Whole Foods in Clarendon, and head home in preparation for a nice weekend of whirlwind travel.

Actually got a call on the 22nd from big brother, looking for info on our travel plans, and if we wanted to meet up for dinner before Shrimpfest (Mr. Fisherman doesn't eat seafood, so for him the menu suddenly doesn't appeal to him). I think I politely declined, but was "looking forward to seeing them." Thought the call was a bit odd, but didn't think much of it.

Called big brother again on the 23rd to wish him a happy birthday (for those playing at home, Kim and Bryan share the same birthday, as do I with his wife Anna). Admittedly an extremely brief call, but I had spoken to him the night before, and was going to see him the next evening.

We head to the movies, and I naturally turn my phone off. As we depart, and I go to check voicemail, a curious message from Bryan that there was some spat between him and the Red man that morning, and that they would not be seeing us at Shrimpfest. Maybe we could get together while we were up there.

Are you kidding me? Did I mention our schedule?

So I call back, and he gives some long-winded explanation about how having a phone call earlier with Dad, and getting into a big argument about something that happened the previous Spring between Anna and my Dad's wife Sue, that apparently got tied into Bryan's lack of communication with me and our sister, and that his decision was made that they wouldn't be going, it just wasn't a good time, and that he was sticking to his guns. Maybe we could come to his place before we went to West Chester, it's about the same travel-time anyway, and their 9 month-old wasn't felling well, and that it just wasn't a good time, and he was sticking to his guns...

Rrrrrrright. Whatever.

So I give him the bird's eye of our schedule, and where we have some free time at the park to meet up with some other friends and their son who's Harry's age. Maybe they could meet up with us there.

well, their 9 month-old wasn't felling well, the Park may be too much, it just wasn't a good time, and he was sticking to his guns... we'd talk tomorrow.

Right around now, some of you who have been paying particularly close attention may recall that my own original travel plans for this holiday season revolved mostly around no travel whatsoever. We'd be in VA, and everyone has our address. If you'd like to come by, we'd love to see you, and if you can't make it, we certainly understand, and we'll see you sometime soon.

My sister got wind of that "plan" and made it clear that it wasn't going to fly. This was one of her few trips back from Seattle during the year, and I certainly wasn't going to be the one to stick a fork in the Shrimpfest tradition if she had anything to say about it. So we decided that perhaps we'd oblige and make an appearance. Compound that with the staunch effort to not be traveling on Kim's birthday, and we suddenly were spending an entire day in West Chester, hanging out.

So you can imagine that the next call, after confirming the sudden turn of events, was to Meghan to find out what was going on, and get her side of the story. Admittedly, the details were hazy at this point to her, but she was indeed aware of a blowup conversation between Magoo and Bryan that morning, that seems to have somehow stemmed from Meghan relaying a request for a more varied menu...?

This is getting dumberer by the second... no?

So onto the other horse's mouth. A call to Magoo confirmed the heated exchange (perhaps better described as acrid) and a personal experience of the low-blow argumentative style that my brother has so glamorously displayed in the past (although certainly not to anyone outside of our immediate family, only internally), and the ensuing rude awakening that he indeed continues to exist in his own world. That said, Magoo had planned to let things cool down -- on both sides of the fence -- and would again re-invite them tomorrow.

You’ve got to admire the unprecedented gall, if nothing else, to be able to call out the host on something that you screwed up yourself six months prior, and turn that into enough of a heated exchange to bring down the party for everyone else, and expect everyone else to come running to you to change their best-laid plans, so you can feel superior… after all, you stuck to your guns.

With no intention of changing any of our plans, we give everyone a chance to sleep on tings and head out as planned the next morning. Just above Baltimore, I decide that it’s as bad a time as any to return Bryan’s call, to see what their plans are, if they’ve changed at all, and where they are going to be. No sign of the olive branch that Magoo was to have offered, and indecision at best to meet us at the park, but he’d call back. Almost at our destination, I give Meghan a ring to see what she knows, only to catch her in her very own emotional state. Turns out that Bryan does plan to meet up at the park, but very clearly (read: loudly) makes it known to Meghan that he absolutely will NOT be coming to Magoo’s place, and that if she has any problem with that, she’d better let him know right then. Ah, diplomacy.

So we finally arrive, only to find Meghan still fresh in her emotional state. After all, her only intention in this trip was to get to see everyone in one place before heading back out west.

After an admittedly very awkward greeting with the Magoos and a quick lunch, Meghan, Kim, Harry and I set out to meet up with whomever was coming to Everhart Park.

Lisa and her son Christian arrived in short order, and the boys had a blast going from one sliding board to the next, climbing on various expressions of Fire Engines-turned-Jungle Gyms, and tossing leaves at and around each other.

And up rolls the Saab wagon. Out pop Bryan, Anna and Patrick, like there’s nothing wrong. All smiles, no hint of apprehension, aggression, or even apology. No mention of why we were meeting in the park, why they decided at the last minute to ruin the party, what they were going to do instead, or even any future get-togethers. Of course, why would they? In their world, as always, they’re right, and you don’t matter.

There’s nothing like making small-talk with a couple of people who have to win at everything. Even at small-talk. It’s one thing to not get a word in because the other person is always going, but it’s completely another when no matter how much of an open-ended question you ask, it immediately gets turned into a closed one.

Harry and Christian all the while are flying higher than ever on the swings with very well-timed “Whheeees” and Whoooooooooas.” Patrick eventually got on and proceeded to doze right off.

So after about an hour of strained conversation, they decide it’s time for them to go home, but they’d like to exchange gifts. So Meghan and I head back to Magoo’s to get things out of our car, and Bryan & Anna meet us there in their car. Nothing like standing out in front of the house, handing each other shopping bags of loot, and making nice at good-bye time.

Meghan and I headed back to the park, myself feeling as if a weight had been lifted and the whole thing was done for a while. We snapped some more photos of the boys on their swings, slides, fire engines and see-saws, and headed back to Magoos for a Shrimpfest that couldn’t be beat, and headed to NJ the next morning.

Depending on how you look at it, the best drama we could come up with on the east side of the river was the most Christmas gifts we’d ever seen in one room for 2 kids (courtesy of Dominic and Isabella Decker), and the utter panic on Harry’s face when he actually made it to see the real Fire Engines up close & personal, inside Allen’s fire hall (Extended thanks and warm wishes to all the guys at Erlton Fire Hall)

I guess the moral of the story so far, is that the effect of poor decisions can be exponentially compounded when coupled with tasteless timing. Situationally speaking of course, sticking to one’s guns can certainly be a respectable decision to come to, but to blindly do it without regard to your extended audience can be a real pain in the ass.

Overall, I’d have to say a relatively well-spent holiday weekend. A bit compressed, but Harry got to see a LOT of people who all seemed to be incredibly appreciative of his presences and smiles. I’d hate to think that we ever take them for granted, but they were certainly out in full force this weekend.

Sorry to have rambled on so much, but I hope you all had an even better time than we did, and best wishes for the coming year.

May the extent of your drama be big red parked fire engines, and too many toys in one room.

It's my birthday!
Is this my last year before middle age?
I figure 33-66 is middle age.
But when do I buy the porsche?
Is that at about 46? 47?
Hmmm....I am thinking I will need a boat instead.
I plan to take up sailing for my mid-life crisis.

Oh, brother!

I found this message in my inbox today from crib notes:

The bottom line is that the world's a big and sometimes scary place for us grown-ups. Imagine what it must sometimes seem like through the eyes of your toddler!

Whatever happened to There's Nothing to Fear But Fear Itself? I guess I should be lucky that so far Harry is not afraid of much. Sure, there was an incedent with bunny Victoria when she bounced. Once Bailey's barking startled Harry. Another time he didn't like a school bus. I have also heard talk that vaccuums frighten him (but seriously, when is he going to come in contact with a vaccuum at our house?). All of these things he has rebounded from. ALL OF THEM! Maybe this won't be true forever, but right now I am glad that it is.

All of these articles tell us to "Respect the fear." I think what a lot of that brings people to is enabling them - enabling their fear. Sure, we can be empathetic, but avoiding supposed scary things just keeps us shut up in the house all day. I think it is more important, even at a young age, to face a problem head on.

I am not saying that if a child is afraid of water you should throw him off of the high dive, but I am saying to get back on the horse, so to speak. There is no evidence to support that Harry has been traumatized by checking in on Victoria or petting picture sof bunnies. He got back on his little car after he fell off of it. He doesn't wnat to get out of his PJs most mornings but he does - and without tears. It is his job to go to school in the morning - something I learned from the wife and mother of psychiatrists. Empathy only goes so far. Sometimes you have to do your job, even if your job is to learn how to put your shoes on.

If we all did what we wanted many of us would be home in bed most days instead of going to work. And if I had been pushed a little bit more, maybe I would have learned to dive. Harry's childhood is still fun and stress free, but even children need boundaries. Boundaries are what comfort them.

TC Williams Crew

I saw a bumper sticker yesterday, and for split second it made me happy.
Flashback to 1992. When leaving for college, the only thing I wished for was to not have a fat roommate. Overweight was okay, but I did not want fat. And don't take offense if you think you are fat. We are old now. Things were different 15 years ago.

My friend Justin drove down with my dad and me and helped me lug boxes up however many flights of stairs at Elkton Hall. I think he snooped before I did. "Size 2!" he proudly informed me!
I was so relieved.

By December 1992 I had gone from a healthy 114 pounds (after a prior anorexic summer weighing in at 95) to 156 over the holidays. I turned into a poor college student with no clothes to wear, no money to buy more, and lowered self esteem. I had become the fat roommate. Why? Because size 2 roommate had some sort of parasite, along with a phobia that kept her from eating alone at 3 in the morning!

In case you weren't following, be careful what you wish for.

It goes with out saying that before Harry was born we hoped he would be healthy, but also smart, athletic, attractive and charming. Well, in my couldn't-possibly-be-more-biased way, I think we have achieved all of that.

Back to the bumper sticker, what if Harry decides to do crew in 15 years? What if his swimming lessons pay off, he becomes a great swimmer and a top athlete? What if a fellow crew person falls in the water, Harry jumps in to save the person, and then gets caught up in the undertow and we never see him again? I just don't think I could go on (she says dramatically).

This may seem extreme, but I am pretty sure it was the TC Williams coach that drowned last year after saving one of the students at Crew practice. For my sake, and possibly only my sake, I hope Harry doesn't grow up to be a hero. At least, not a fallen hero.

As if I didn't have enough to worry about...except I really don't...

Happy Solstice Day!
The sun returns tomorrow!!!!

Does anyone else out there miss Kevin's commentary?
P.S. Long live Kong!

I forgot!

I forgot to mention Harry's great weekend, and what a sweet cuddly little boy he has become!
Highlight for me: Harry standing at the top of the slide yelling "Hannah!" as in "Hannah, look at me!" It killed me that I was camera-less for this event.

Harry had a great visit from Grandma this weekend. To our delight, while she was here he seemed to only play with gifts she had given him, from magnets, to bedtime story cards, to blocks. I swear, we did not do a single practice drill before hand!

Sunday we brought our 5th visitor to The Little Gym. Past visitors have included Grandmom, Aunt Meg, Lance and Lola. Harry had a blast as usual. He does well on the balance beam. He grabs your hand and walks one foot in front of the other at great speed. He loves to put the bells and balls away. Even running around the mat for warm up is fun. And it was cute to see him walk around, elbows at his side, hands in the air, asking everyone "where's Ma-ma?" He is so cute!

We headed out to Old Town and had some lunch at La Madeleine, where we have not been for a while. Later, since it was actually a little bit nice out, Harry got to walk around Old Town and climb all over the pavilion stage in the center of town. He was exhausted and napped for over an hour!

Kevin made dinner around 5, and Harry went to his own kitchen to help out. He busied himself putting items in the microwave and pulling his pizza out of the oven, very carefully putting two slices on each plate.

I dashed out with the girls to go to Bon Jovi. I was stressed about what to wear, but ended up dressed just like JBJ himself in jeans and a long sleeved black top with boots. Lucky for me I was at the concert when Harry cut his finger in the bath tub. He has been a trooper and has gone through 7 band-aids since. He keeps them on as he is supposed to, and lets us know if it falls off.

Sunday I woke up bright and early with Harry. You would have thought it was Harry's father and grandma who were out partying like rock stars the night before, because they woke up much later and demanded coffee. To give credit...they stayed home and baked cookies for my cookie swap with May and Kelly.

Kevin and Harry showed up Sunday at Kelly's after dropping Grandma off at the airport. Harry played blocks with Ledi and Hannah introduced him to play-doh. He loves it, so I will be heading to the store to buy some play-doh accessories later.

Post play-doh party, we headed to the park at MacArthur ELementary. FOUR separate playground sets! It is fabulous! Hannah played with Harry and took him up and down the slides. They ran and giggled and Hannah quizzed the little man on where his ears, eyes, nose, shirt, head, toes, etc were. Harry even slid down the crazy circle slide with Ledi who is just a little elf herself, though she will be 6 very soon. Lots of giggles all around!

Missed Donna's party Sunday night. Once again, was looking forward to it. Harry was exhausted after so much activity though, and I decided it was more important that he unwind a little at home. He was in bed before 7. And today he spent at least an hour this morning sitting calmly on my lap, just hanging out. He really is just so sweet these days. DO you think soemoen told him about Santa?

I don't want to.

I will be 32 in 4 days, and I am just now learning to say "no" . I mean, I am sure as a 2 year old I was an expert, and I did pretty well in high school when it came to drugs, sex, whatever...but eventually I lost the ability. Erma Bombeck tells you there are more important things to do then sleep. Transients tell you to never turn down an invitation. You want to be active, blah, blah, blah. But there are other sides too. There are people who tell you you need downtime. I just never thought it applied to parties. Okay, maybe I was taught that it did not apply to parties. After all, I used to get an earful every year from my dad for missing his superbowl party to write my research paper that always seemed to be due the next day.
I think part of me still clings to the high school/college mentality that forced you to go out every Friday and Saturday night. Somewhere along the way, we became obligated to go to weekday parties, too. But know what? I am now learning that there are certain things I would rather do than obligate myself to go to places I don't want to be. Yeah, we drove to Jersey for 3 hours on Thanksgiving, but I mostly wanted to go. Tonight I do not want to go to a dinner. I am taking a stand. I don't have to go. I am not going to be blacklisted from society for missing one dinner. I have other obligations, namely, Harry. I WANT to stay home and have dinner with Harry and Kevin, get Harry ready for bed and play blocks with him. I am not missing a dinner to watch TV, I am missing a dinner for a better invitation: one with my son. That one is more important. And you know what? It is also more fun!

A big shout out to Harry's Dad. He is the greatest guy ever! And I am not just saying that because my birthday is next week!

Rising Before The Son

I am on a kick to regain all of my lost energy. One step I decided to take was to get (my 3rd) light up alarm clock. This one ALSO wakes you up with nature sounds and aromatherapy. I thought I could use it to gradually and quietly rise by 6, then do yoga until H wakes up. I thought this would be pereferable to jolting out of bed when the baby monitor comes alive.

Today I jolted out of bed when I felt I was under attack by a pack of very loud birds. Running across the room to turn off the clock seemed to wake Harry, who had been sleeping soundly since 7:30 last night.

I really need to read the instruction book tonight.

But - I did start my day alert!

Too Late!

To all of you folks out there who decide NOW that we should not buy you anything for Christmas, I say, you are now getting an extra one. You are getting a calendar! So you can look at it and see that it is already December. MID December. Dude, my gifts are wrapped!

I shop for gifts all year, and I try to find appropriate gifts that I think you will like. Not too big, not too small, something that is useful, or will make you laugh or will make you feel good. For you to turn it down makes me feel bad. Accept the gift graciously. Say thank you. If you hate it, re-gift it.

No one is asking for a gift in return. 'Tis better to give than to receive. I don't always like my gifts either, and I often fight the deep wounds I feel when someone gets me something I don't like. It obviously means they don't know a thing about me. Why do I even bother? Why am I in their lives? -No, what it means is that they are bad shoppers!

Just cause you may be a bad shopper, don't ruin my fun! Wrap up a candle or some bath beads and say "I am a bad shopper!" It's okay. I will still like the bath beads. In fact, I need bath beads. I need Q-tips. Actually, I could also really use a new tube of Sensodyne - and I will think of you every time I use it! If you give me a gift I do not like, I will do my best not to say so...or I will re-gift it!

Gift's should not be mandatory, but if someone gives you one, you should not turn it away! That makes the other person feel a lot worse than "wasting" money on it or not getting something likeable in return.

:-Þ

It's snowing again!!!

Personal Training

My new personal trainer is GREAT GREAT GREAT! Love her! And she is a Master's Trainer, so I get an awesome workout. But, since she is a mom, she only works like 10 hours a week, so she cannot charge master trainer rates, so I save big bucks! Plus, I work-out with Kelly, which only adds to the training, and also saves bucks!

I worked out today even with the stomach issues, but I think I am on the road to recovery now. I even have a newfound burst of confidence. Maybe teh overdose of enzymes cleared up my focus. The confidence applies to a lot of things, but also that we do the right things with Harry. This is not to say that right today is going to be right tomorrow, but I think we re-evaluate on a daily basis.

Daycare is the right choice for Harry. A lot of people ask why I bring this up so much, and ask if I have doubts about it. No. Like I said, I re-evaluate it, but daycare is best for Harry. He socializes with other kids, still gets personal attention, learns manners and how to interact with people, and he learns how to be away from home, which I think was easy to just blend into at 6 weeks then to suddenly be dropped off somewhere when he was two. Sometimes though - no, REGULARLY though, other people perhaps do not think before they speak, or at least stop to think who their target audience might be. Personal Trainer lady seems to be having trouble keeping her 1 year old in the gym daycare two hours a day, 5 days a week...even with mommy right next door.

I can see the boy through the window, and he look spretty happy to me. Trainer lady still brings this up often though. "It's not fair to him." She is trying to move 2 of her work hours to evenings because "They are missing out on so much." It's two hours. What are they missing out on? She mentioned music classes. Kelly brought up that it would be good for the boy to spend time with his dad one evening a week. Trainer lady changed the subject. She is also concerned about the biting and hitting that he's "picked up." The other kids in the gym daycare are 3 year old girls. Sure, some bite and hit. My neighbor pinched me until I hit her with my lunch box- and she was home-schooled. Harry bit for a while, but none of the kids in his class did. It is natural and he has grown out of it for the most part. He bites when he is excited or frustrated. I am sure that is the same for trainer kid, but trainer lady is too guilt stricken to believe this.

At least Kelly's daughter was in daycare at a young age too. Many of my friends work, and that is a good support system for me. But, it doesn't leave me walking around all day asking "SAHMs" if they feel selfish keeping their kids home with them all day.

Adventures of a Real Boy

My weekend bout of food poisoning has not seemed to slow Harry down at all. He's kept himself busy around the house, hammering, wrenching, dancing, learning new words...

I thought I was having a serious IBS flare on Thursday...or got sick from the too much beer I used in a Beef Stew recipe...or became chained to the potty from too many probiotic enzymes...and then I decided it was the meatball sandwich from Subway. This is why I need to go back to veganism. I still have not strayed far from the potty.

Harry made it to gymnastics, but we skipped a tree trimming party and I did not run the Jingle Bell 10K today. I was looking forward to both. Luckily, Harry most likely has no clue we were supposed to go to the pool today. I am sure he would be disappointed. We still plan to have Lance over for a play date and gift exchange.

So, instead of his usually active weekend activities, Harry has remained indoors. I still fin d it horribly dull, and am going a bit nuts, but we have used it as a learning opportunity. After Harry watched Kevin put some shelves together, he proceeded to borrow the funky IKEA wrench and Darth Tater's light saber to fix everything from plastic chairs to door hinges. He helped us put his plate sin the sink, his ripped envelopes into the trash, and his shoes in his room. After watching Zoe, Elmo and Baby Bear play with a ball on "Nename" he had fun throwing his own ball around the house. He then saw another "Nename" episode about feet, so he ran around the house with no shoes on, counting toes and dancing. He neatly stacked dominoes on the ottoman, and watched in awe as Kevin lined his up and knocked them down.

Harry repeated almost every word we said this weekend. He ate a "Blueberry" muffin. He sang "Ba Ba Ba Ba-Ba" to them theme of Sing. He giggled a lot. And observed everything.

It's supposed to snow again! Yaaay! It makes the season so much more festive!

My Toddler This Week: Your 19-month-old (week 3): Fun with Reading

New this month: Versed in verbs
The vocabulary of a typical 19-month-old toddler may consist of as few as ten words or as many as 50. Yours may be able to link two or more words together, (Harry is a big fan of Bub-Bulls and tonight was saying, while on the phone "Pop pop? Blow Bub-bulls.") and is starting to use more "action" words. Verbs like "go" and "jump" are common, (Go has been common, blow is new, help is new) and so is linking a verb with her name (or pronoun), as in "Come me," meaning "Come with me." (Harry is definitely using his name now. He points to himself when he says "Hahd-dee" and somehow seem s to use his pronouns correctly- me for me, you for you...I am surprised by this, actually, and think it may be a fluke). (It will be some months before she inserts the preposition.) Many 19-month-olds are also well-versed in direction words such as "up," "down," "under," "out," and "in." (He follows directions superbly, and uses all but under. Last night, I asked him if he wanted to go out on the porch to look at the lights and snow. He got his jacket and walked to the door. Yeah. He follows directions. Beyond my expectations).

What you can do:
You'll also discover that when you read familiar stories, if you pause at certain points in the text, your toddler will fill in the blank. To test this, next time you're reading a book that your toddler has heard dozens of times, pause at the end of a sentence and see what happens. If Goodnight Moon is a bedtime standard, try this: "In the great green room, there was a telephone and a red ..." "Balloon!" she'll likely shout.

Looking at picture books with your toddler, and labeling the objects for her, will help build her vocabulary. While you're at it, explain to her what the object does, what sounds it makes, or what it feels like. For instance, you might say, "This is a horse. Horses are big. They run fast," or "Here's a fire truck. It's red." You get the idea. And if you want proof that your child understands more words than she can say, when you're looking at books, ask her, "Where's the red tractor?" or "Where's the white horse?" and odds are she'll point right to it. Yes!

Other developments: "Motor learning," favorite toys
Toddlers learn by touching, holding, and moving objects from one place to another. They struggle to push or pull heavy objects, toss light ones across a room, and observe how small objects literally slip between their fingers. Experts call this "motor learning," and this constant testing teaches children about size, weight, and shape. You may think it's just fun for her, and even get frustrated with the inevitable messes that your 19-month-old's explorations create, but she's learning about perception and spatial relationships, concepts that will be important in a few years when she's introduced to math. This is an age when many toddlers enjoy trying to match shapes together, so a shape-sorting box is an ideal toy for a 19-month-old.

Starting last month, you may have noticed that your child was finally interested in playing with toys. No- this has been for quite a few months now...This month she may become engrossed in a favorite plaything for 20 or 30 minutes — an eternity to you if your child has been unwilling to let you out of arm's reach. He can already play by himself for an hour if you let him. He has for a while. It's been very convenient! But also neat to watch!

Since toddlers tend to be enthusiastic explorers, be sure to choose toys that are safe. Board books, musical instruments, nesting blocks and boxes, stacking toys, toy telephones (without cords), and push-and-pull toys are top toys for toddlers. Make sure the toys, and any parts attached to them, are too large to be swallowed, do not have detachable parts that could pose a choking hazard, won't break into small pieces if thrown on the ground, don't have sharp points or edges, and don't have moveable parts that could pinch fingers.

So there you have it!

Baby Face

I don't think I realize a lot of the time how young Harry actually is....until we put a hat on him! Or better yet: a snowsuit! When you can't see his massive head of hair, he turns into a tiny little baby! It's kind of freaky! Cute little baby face though...

Men in Uniform

WHen you see a man in uniform, as a civilian, how are you to address them? I always feel like I should salute. Or say thank you. Or DO SOMETHING! Usually, I just smile and try to seem appreciative. Any recomendations? (keep it clean, ladies!) I am referring to all of our heros: military, cops, firemen, ...

Yuppy Puppy

When we named our little black headed beagle Bailey 7.5 years ago, we were accused by at least our West Coast friends of being yuppies. As though it were a bad thing. In actuality, along with all of those Saranac, Guinness, and Remy owners, we named her after alcohol. If that makes us yuppies, so be it. And if taking her to Your Dog's Best Friend - Positive Playcare for Doggie Daycare makes us yuppies, well, what can you do...

Blame it on the Snow.
Or Kevin. Or the endless Christmas music that plays in my car.

Yes, Virginia, Harry may celebrate Santa Claus.
It's a work in progress. And it will not be large scale.

What Harry did this weekend:

Missed gymnastics
Strolled to Lance's house
Found a cave at the Scottish Walk
Slid down a slide
Hitched a ride home from Lola sans car seat
Ate a home made uncrustable
Watched too much Sesame Street
Played in the ball pit with lots of rowdy big kids at IKEA
Figured out the water bucket system at Mt. Vernon rec center pool
Colored with new markers
Giggled and cuddled a lot
Went night night

Ahem! At least Dr. Sears never claimed to be a brain surgeon. Guess he finally figured out what the rest of us (I, for one) already knew...

(From the SleepLady newsletter)

Welcome to this month's Snooze Week!
Happy Holidays! It was a pleasure to hear from so many of you last month! Once again early rising strikes a cord! We got hundreds of emails in response to the Early Riser topic! Please remember
that The Sleep Lady is available for individual consultation to
discuss and hopefully solve your child's early rising pattern. Many of you forwarded me the insightful article in this week's Wall Street Journal - "New Advice on Getting Babies Back to Sleep". Dr. Ferber softens his stance on letting infants cry themselves to sleep and Dr Sears says he now thinks his earlier books placed
too much emphasis on catering to the baby's needs and
did not address the parents' needs enough--"What your baby needs is a happy, rested mother" quote from Sears). Thankfully, you and I have been here waiting for them to join us in The Sleep Lady's middle-of-the-road-approach this whole time!

It's about time!

Out of Context

Try not to take things too seriously
Make my vote count
Not worry about pleasing everyone
To thine own self be true

Things I Like
1. Vince Vaughn
2. Short haircuts on guys
3. Doing yoga at the beach, or at least in a hotel room with an awesome view of the beach and an open door to hear the waves and a company to pick up the tab
4. Tan Skin
5. Keeping my cool

Things I Hate
1. People who are not punctual
2. People who don’t have kids or pets but think they know how to raise them best, just because their Midwestern parents were able to keep 5 kids in a shopping cart or threaten them into good behavior with the fear of God.
3. My lost willpower to eat right
4. People who think daycare is not fair
5. Bleeding heart liberals

New Years Resolutions
Stick to proper eating habits
Do more yoga
Get back in fighting shape
Stop reading trashy magazines just to fit in with people I already fit in with
Return to perky

Things I will not be doing this month
Traveling on my birthday
Visiting St. Nick
Accepting Jesus Christ as my savior
Judging others for their choices
Donating to Toys for Tots at my FIT Ladies holiday party
Sharing my true feelings
Being a negative twit

Things I will be doing
Saying no to things I don’t want to do
Giving people the benefit of the doubt
Spending some down time with The Rockin’ Gnome! (pictures to follow)
Looking for ways to spend the rest of our Flex Spending
Happily wrapping the gifts I want to give people and adding thoughtful notes to the packages

"Did Harry Go See Santa Claus?"

Wow- I had nearly f orgotten about this question. Luckily, several folks have reminded me.
The answer:

NO!!!!

No he did not see Santa!

And he will not be left out or his childhood destroyed becasues of this. Lots of kids don't go to see Santa.

An open mind is a sign of intelligence, and mine is not closed on this issue, but for the reasons you will see below, we are at the moment choosing to not expose Harry to the belief in Santa Claus. Other elves are fine, but this one has gotten out of hand, and there is some baggage in that sleigh along with the presents.

For now, I know my son, and I would bet his investments that there is very little chance he would willingly stand in line for hours just to see some large man in a red suit with lots of hippy white hair. Harry doesn't like his own relatves to pick him up- why would he allow a stranger at the mall? I have no plans to traumatize the sweet, trusting child in this fashion.

If I have time later, I will scan in the picture of me as a 1 year old screaming my head off on Santa's lap. If you are feeling impatient, rent A Christmas Story. Fast forward to the Santa scene.

Does this mean Santa will most likely not come to Harry's house? Most likely he will not. Harry gets presents all year long from us. We are not home on December 25th anyway, and even if we were, I don't think it is in anyone's best interest to shower more gifts upon him then he knows what to do with. Besides, I am sure Pop Pop will have come up with a few items that "Fell Off The Sleigh" so to speak.

I may have mentioned last year a few reasons why Santa is not coming, but it bears repeating.

1. Santa is a symbol of commercialism. Really. Though I prefer it to Pepsi, we can blame Coca-Cola. This is not to say I do not appreciate the art work as much as the next chick.

2. Who, besides me, was horrified to know that we were kept in the dark and lied to for years about the jolly old elf, only to have some bratty know it all neighbor spill the beens that it was our parents unloading gifts until 4 in the morning? I obviously still have not recovered!

3. Everyone is alsways talking about the "real meanig of Christmas" (which I do not celebrate)yet they prepetuate the Sanata Claus myth. Sure, Santa may represent the spirit of giving, but catch any 4 year old off guard and you will know it is more about receiving. Perhaps Santa is teh variable leading to Columbine. You never know.

I could continue, but you surely must have caught my drift by now.

Harry's holiday will be wonderful. We will celebrate Yule with bright lights and candles. The sparkle is what really tickles his fancy. That is the magic for him. That and tissue paper...and I am sure cookies!
We will spend time sorting through our "Holiday cans." Harry's includes his hospital T-shirt and his monkey shoes. Kevin and I are on our 11th year of goodies, including a lobster pick he rescued from a shop vac at Euro imports! We will spend time together reminiscing over the past year. We will, hopefully, share some bubbly and some good times with frinds and family. There will be presents, but they will be from loved ones.

I have no plans to ruin anyone else's fantasies. I still ask kids what they want from Santa. This doesn't make me a hypocrit. I am respecting the traditions of other families and would hope for the same respect.
When Harry is old enough, the plan now is to explain to him that Santa doesn't go to every house and vaguely explain that we have other traditions. Hopefully he will enjoy them, and we have every intention of making his holidays magickal!

Why I Hate "The Holidays"

Too many different holidays to pick from, and people who get picky and offended if you wish the wrong "Happy... whatever" one. I say if you want to have all of these different celebrations, pick up on a neat little invention called "Observances." Observe your holiday sometime around mid-June when there's nothing else going on. It'll save everyone a lot of confusion and aggravation.

Too many "givers" with ulterior motives. Give someone a gift if you want to. If you don't feel like it, don't. If you'd prefer to make a donation somewhere, make it in your own name... don't take the liberty of doing it "for" someone else. Who's to say that your intentions are the same as theirs. At the same time, don't ride someone for not making said donation if you do. Their prerogative and their intentions are just s valid as yours... not to mention their needs at home.

Too much postage. This time of year suddenly becomes a series of races: the race to get your [insert proper wintertime holiday name here] cards out to everyone you possibly know first (of course, that's after whittling it down to the 2,000 people who made the short-list cut), the race home at the end of the day to see how many of said cards have arrived so you can see how many more cards you got than someone else did, the race from one location to another over the course of the month to celebrate [insert proper wintertime holiday name here].

Weird parties. Too much effort to bring too many people together, who generally are very happy being apart, without offending anyone. Which always ends up being a huge hassle and rigmarole, putting out & offending those who aren't easily offended, and those who we're trying not to offend, tend to be oblivious to the entire situation. What's the mitigating factor tying them all together? You guessed it -- ALCOHOL!

You thought I was going to say Shrimp didn't you...

Why does everything have to get magnified so much over "the holidays?"

The biggest sales, the brightest lights, the Merry-est this, the Chappy-est that... throw on some crappy weather, and cut back on the daily total for hours of sunshine, and you've got a recipe for success.

What a great time of year.

A few things I've made a concerted effort not to be responsible for come this time of year:

Christmas Trees
Kim certainly has her philosophical issues with cutting down a perfectly nice tree and dragging it indoors only for it to become a dry, dangerous, fire hazard for a few weeks, and then throwing it out with the new year's trash not unlike Harry's old diapers. My reasoning is much more pragmatic. Back in the day, or at least as I remember it, I used to be the one stuck with dragging said tree off of the car, in through the house, and then being responsible for: 1) finding the stand, 2) assembling said stand (easier said than done most years), 3) affixing said stand to aforementioned fresh-cut still-sappy tree -- usually with nothing remotely close to the proper tool for the job (whatever tool that may be), and 4) positioning and standing it in place. After years of pine-needle vacuuming, and re-decorating after it decided to tumble over (usually about 5 minutes after the trimming was complete), and now that I've been on my own for a bit, Christmas trees are no longer on my list of Holiday Needs.

Stringing Lights
While many can attest to the fact that we have decorated with lights for at least the last 5 or 6 years, I think it's safe to say that I've done my best to steer clear of the responsibility.

Buying Gifts
It's blatantly obvious that Kim is much more genuinely thoughtful than I am, and if I seem to have weaseled my way into someone's heart as being thoughtful, chances are high that it's purely her doing. As such, she's much better at knowing what's the right thing to say, do, or present someone with at a any time of the year. As with most things around "the holidays," this also, is greatly magnified during the month of December. While I would certainly love to be as thoughtful and insightful as to the wants, needs, likes and dislikes of everyone around us, that's certainly Kim's area of expertise. Why mess with a good thing -- although it does make getting her birthday gift on the 23rd that much harder.

This -- all of this -- is why if I had my way, we'd be home for "the holidays" doing whatever it is that we would do (as we've never accomplished this, coming up with a game-plan may be appropriate first). However, with work & family traditions being what they are, that's highly unlikely.

And so it goes, another "holiday season" will shortly be upon us, as will another weekend of quality time on the interstate, and wondering what Bailey got into wherever she inevitably will end up, and how much the vet bill will be this time -- when ARE they going to allow veterinary care to qualify for Healthcare Flex Spending???

Happy Holiday(s)

> The Grinch.

Joys of parenting

I put Harry to bed all by myself last night! I don’t think this was exactly the first time ever, but it has been the first time Harry has been aware of it! Kevin chose to work late to make up for some PTO he took when Harry was sick. The day seemed kind of surreal to me. I had encouraged Kevin to work late if he needed to. Now that Harry doesn’t require me to carry him at all times, my body can endure the solo childcare. Harry can even entertain himself for brief periods, which he did while I fixed his dinner. One added caviat, I had to give him his medicine. It really is something awful. The look of betrayal in his eyes as tears roll down his face and he gives in to the madness…anyway, after dinner we watched some Sesame Street (we successfully got him hooked on that. Now we need to find some indoor winter activities instead! I am thinking after dinner music hour) and had a quick bath. I think Harry was cold so he didn’t stay in long. I remember not wanting to get a bath in winter when I was a kid. Cold! As 7:30 rolled around, Harry did not want to get into his crib. Since every other night he goes willingly, I didn’t want to traumatize the wee lad, so I let him find Bailey for one final goodnight hug, and then we called Daddy to see where he was. Harry just wanted to hear his voice. He spent the next hour calmly sitting on my lap on the chair in his room and holding my phone. When he was ready, around 8:00, he handed me the phone and expressed that it was time for bed. The quiet time was priceless! Harry has never been so cuddly…at least not until he started watching television. Now he seems to enjoy having one of us hold him that much more..at least for watching Sesame Street or reading stories. See, TV is not all bad!

A Few of Harry's Favorite Things

1. Soy Milk aka Mimo
2. Shaking his finger and saying "no."
3. Sesame Street
4. Hugging Bailey
5. Playing with kids

Things Harry Hates

1. Medicine
2. Taking baths when it is cold out
3. Carrot Juice
4. Vaccuum Cleaners
5. Medicine

Round One of the 2005 Holiday Season is behind us.

We finally left our home at 11:36 AM on Thursday on our way to New Jersey. We sat through two renditions of Alice's Restaurant and roughly 5 hours of traffic. The worst part of the traffic: by the time we hit Maryland House we worried that we missed Pierre. We did not. He was on until 3. We did indeed receive our warm welcome home.

Thanksgiving at April's was tasty. Harry got to play with Belle and Dominic and we got to share time with our loved ones. We headed home once Harry got sleepy. Traffic on the way back was nearly non-existant, but the winds were mighty. I was actually a bit worried crossing the bridges. Our leaves were in a neat windblown pile when we got home.

Friday was Tofurkey Day. After a run with Tara and a trip to Starbuck's with Tara and H, I headed home to prepare a second day of feasting. Tofurkey, Fresh Cranberry Sauce, Hot Cider...My mom and Allen came down for the day. Bryan & Anna swung by with Patrick. Lola, Amber and Sir Lance-a-little joined us and we enjoyed cocktails with Dan, Janie and Tara. A relaxing evening.

Saturday was Little Gym. More of the kids seemed cranky then not. I suppose Harry wasn't the only one that had had a long week. I worried when he sneezed on AJ, since AJ's dad is the quietest of the parents, but his surprisingly friendly response was 'Don't worry, it's nothing he doesn't already have!" I like The Little Gym!

The remainder of the weekend was spent as a family, mostly at home except for a quick shopping trip and a haircut for the little man, as well as a mental health excursion for Bailey. We actually had time to unpack some boxes and loosen up a little. Harry helped Kevin rake leaves while I hung up some white holiday lights. We seem to be the first on our block to have decorated. Hopefully not the last. Holiday cards are completed through M. Waiting for 12/1 to get them out.

Check out the new blog at http://blogmommyblog.blogspot.com/
I think this first one kind of sucks, but I was actually pretty nervous about writing it. Feel free to make suggestions for more exciting blogs! Maybe I can write about teh endless supply of Sesame Street dialogue and songs that run through my head. Scram, You're Fired!

MOM

Strange as it may seem, I am still not comfortable with the word mom. I still don't feel like a mom. I think Kevin feels more like one than I do. Perhaps this is because he takes on more of the traditional mom roles while I take on less. I am not saying that Kevin takes on more parenting duties than I do, though some may argue the case. I think we share things very equally, in a seesaw fashion. Sometimes I do more (no need to smirk), sometimes he does more. I worry that he does more far too often. As I am writing this, I am beginning to think that I am an idiot. I am sure I am not the first woman to realize this, though it often seems this way. Kevin and I both work. We both pay bills. We both have identities of our own. We both contributed equally to Harry's DNA. Why shouldn't we share the joys and responsibilities of parenting Harry equally? I think this is why the word "Mom" gets to me so much. When I read books, magazines, blogs…I identify with "Dad" a lot more. I think a lot of Dad articles are more balanced, and they so often discuss the judgments that are passed their way. I feel like the word Dad entails a lot more balance. It is assumed if you are a dad you spend time away from your child, that you have a job and responsibilities and downtime…and other interests. The impression I get of the word mom is that you are never away from your child. EVER! If you are, there must be a VERY GOOD reason why. Perhaps your husband was laid off and you must reluctantly leave the home to find gainful employment. Perhaps a highly qualified nanny is supervising a well suited playdate while you run to the supermarket for supplies. Perhaps a grandparent dropped in so you could have 30 minutes to yourself. Moms know everything and decide everything for their child, even if Dad has a better option or logic would say to do something differently. The reality is, sometimes what is best for your child is NOT being with them every second of the day. When I run into people at Starbucks, or a new trainer at the gym asks where Harry is or who takes care of him when I travel, they are often taken aback that he is at daycare or that Kevin takes care if him. I was flying home first class from Florida the other day. There happened to be FOUR women in first class with me. This NEVER happens. The woman next to me (they didn't even space us out!) also had young children and traveled a lot. She didn't once ask who was watching Harry. We discussed how lucky our kids were to have two parents actively involved in their lives. We discussed how much we valued our time together and the fun little things we do for them when we are away (so far, I select Harry's clothes for the days I am gone and chat with him on the phone, but I look forward to the days when I can leave him happy notes or little surprises or fax homework corrections). We also discussed how great it is that they have other people in their lives, such as daycare providers or school chums that they can interact with and learn from. Some people actually ask why he doesn't have a nanny. Well, several reasons, none of which include the cost:

1. I did not want Harry alone with 1 person all day in case something happened to the person either through injury while she was with Harry or that she didn't show up for work one day, or that 1 person alone, unsupervised, could harm Harry.

2. I wanted Harry to be around other children in a casual, playful, learning environment.

3. I cannot work with Harry in the house because I want to play with him when he is there.

4. I don't want him in a car with anyone just yet.

5. I am sure there are others, but I cannot remember them all.

So, while I am in fact a mom, and a pretty good one at that, I feel the word is so limiting. I feel the choices I make are all in Harry's best interests. SOme may say I am kidding myself, but I say, take a look at your own world and see if yours is working as well before judging mine. I think it is good for him to see two people, or three people and a dog, work together as a team. I think it is important for him to see that people are not limited to certain pre-defined roles. I think it is important to not just "mother" Harry, but to let other people have an influence on his life, so that he may learn other cultures, other ways of doing things, other ways of seeing things. I don't think Harry should do everything the same way I do. I look forward to open discussions about so many topics as he gets older. I will surely be one of those parents that stops everything to look something up (and by look up I mean Google it). I feel that my role in Harry's life is to provide him the proper tools to become his own person. Once again, I hope this experiment works better than it did with Bailey! I could not be happier that Harry has a father who is more than someone who writes checks and throws a ball. No disrespect to fathers out there who did little more than show up at 5:30 to instill discipline- things were very different until recently. I am pretty sure that Kevin is the person Harry goes to when he is REALLY scared, sad, not feeling well. I seem to still be the good cop though, and can handle the minor bumps and bruises in Harry's eyes. I think at least one reason this has happened is because Kevin is the sleep whisperer. He is the one that puts Harry to bed in the middle of the night. He is the one that is the "expert" on whether we can pick him up if he is crying. Kevin's expertise in this area can bug me a little, but I know I am gone sometimes, and also afraid of the dark, so I let this one slide, and I instead focus on the things that are mine, like our morning wake-up routine, or our time together after school. I am also looking forward to the 3 days I will be alone with him after Yule while Menike is off yet again. I felt a bit guilty that I left for a business trip while Harry was sick, but I remind myself that I am with a new company that I have done very little for so far, but should benefit me in the long run. I don't need to remind myself that Kevin is very capable. I can take my turn as nursemaid when I get home. I think the guilt comes not from worrying that Harry will suffer in my absence, or that he will love someone else more, or any number of other things, but that I am not doing enough to help Kevin, and he will exhaust himself. Hard as I try, I suspect he would give 200% of himself even if I were home 24/7. I worry that I am not doing my share, but in reality, and I hope Kevin agrees, we are working together towards a common goal, and each taking turns at a variety of tasks, just as we would on a seesaw, and Harry is benefiting from his opportunities. I worry that I cannot thank Kevin enough for being such an amazing dad. Perhaps I don't have to. We've got Harry to show for that!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! I hope you have a great day, and have as much to be thankful for as we do, including our fabulous friends and family!

It's been a while since we've had some serious introspection from the testosterone-laden side of the house, and as Friday's are as good a time as any to take on a diversion or 2 during the day, thought I'd poke my head in and offer some hot air on this cold afternoon...

I know I'm a bit behind on this, but first and foremost, I'd like to offer public congratulations to Kim and all of her co-horts for their participation, both on- and off-course, in the 30th annual Marine Corps Marathon. I still haven't done one yet, and honestly have little inclination to. Regardless, a fantastic effort by all. A gorgeous day, a gazillion fans (and racers for that matter), and Harry still managed to sleep from one end of the Mall to the other -- he literally slept the entire time, as we walked from the National Museum of the Native American, to the USMC Iwo Jima Memorial. Friendly faces accompanying at the pre-race pasta dinner, the Expo, the race itself, and even in the finish line crowd hopefully were all significant factors in bringing everyone over the line.

National-dress-up-in-a-funny-costume-and-panhandle-for-free-candy-day-into-early-evening was also a blast this year. Harry had a blast looting through the neighbors' foyers, and apparently even locked himself in one (he LOVES closing doors behind him, whether you're there or not)! Accompaniment from his right-hand monkey Lance certainly made even better.

Speaking of which, great segue into the party at Casa Savagtny. Although Harry made his grand entrance dead to the world slumbering over Dad's shoulder, but quickly caught his 90th wind of the day just in time to learn how to dip Nacho chips into Salsa -n- Cheez. This is not to say that much, if any, of the dip remained on the chip, nor that the chip made it into Harry's mouth, but he had a lot of fun trying. Lance's dad decided also to break out the strings, and Harry got to get his first real glimpse of me vainly attempting to remember how to fingerpick. Much to Kim's delight, the old standbys came back after only a few botches... like riding a bike.

Another Friday, and another federal holiday make for a great reason to head downtown for a hockey matinee. Thanks to some great seats from Audrius Zubrus, Harry got to get an up close & personal look at the Olympia Ice Resurfacer (no... it's NOT a Zamboni!!!), and even a nice visit from driver Phil shortly after. As with our last outing to MCI Center, it was great to see everyone, and to be seen by everyone else. Looking forward to another jaunt, hopefully to touch base with the extended Wagner clan before Turkey Day.

Follow that with a busy Saturday at the Little Gym, dinner with the Lynch's (newborn Tyler included), and a daytrip to NJ for Dominic Jr's birthday party, and Harry was pooped for sure (in several sense of the word).

This weekend will certainly be just as busy... more hockey, more friends coming to dinner (it's great to finally be able to entertain), and more travel on the horizon.

Harry seems to do very well with all of it, many would note that he handles it all MUCH better than his father ever has (not that you'd get much of an argument). It's not much of a surprise though, as Harry has always been into what's going on around him. From the first few minutes when he was taking everything in with those big wide open eyes, to exploring the video arcade for new games to play, he's always taking it in.

Blogging my way to fame

Hey! I need your help! I have been asked to do a blogspot on the seemommyrun.com website, one that could even end up on a sponsor's website. I need to come up with something pretty soon. Something brief and positive about fitness, motherhood, babies...Any suggestions?
Here are the choices:

1. Cat's in the Cradle - my blog about guilt experienced through travel, and it's upside
2. Andre Agassis- similar to my post about Agassi's kid hitting the ball over the net, and how thrilled I was when Harry scaled the rock wall at the playground
3. Importance of fitting in Fitness while working full time
4. Harry's increased confidence through gymnastics, and how it applies to the rest of his life
5. Other---but make a suggestion (please!)

Thank you!!! Maybe I can eventually publish the Great American Novel after all!

Thankful

Looks like we will be headed to Jersey this year for Turkey Day after all. We were sort of iffy, but traditions are important. Life just wouldn't be the same without a warm welcome home from Pierre Robert, DJ extraordinnaire. Perhaps we can email him a request for some tunes from the Hooters when we cross the border!

Hannah will be checking in on Bailey. She really wants to start a pet sitting business. Most of the effort will be on Kelly's part, since, for one, 8 year olds don't drive...Hmmm...perhaps in the future she can hire Nicholas from across the street. I am sure she would see the logic behind giving him 50% of the profit to do 100% of the work! They are both great kids. I am thankful Harry gets to grow up with them! The kids in our neighborhood are so friendly and well adjusted. The adults seem to be as well.

I am thankful for a lot really. It has been a really great year for us. Actually, teh years seem to keep getting better. Not all luck, certainly, but a lot of hard work. I am thankful for my wonderful friends and family, especially the new little ones that keep popping up. I can't wait to see Harry grow up with them. I think it is the people in your life that really make it what it is. I am thankful that I have the world's best husband who does everything just perfectly (with the exception of putting his cell phone charger away). I am thankful that Harry is a happy, healthy, well-adjusted little cutie-pie, and I am thankful that I have job options and that my job is well suited for me. Most of all I am thankful that we were able to move away from our freakshow neighbor and her son. I don't want to say anything too negative that might bring about bad Karma, but it is just really nice to not feel like we are being stalked every time we turn on a light or enter the backyard. We really loveteh new neighborhood - even with the still packed boxes.

Anyway, off to meet Kelly at the gym. Have to sneak in time during the day so that I don't miss my Harry time. It's so cold outside though! Maybe I'll bring my laptop and catch up on some work afterwards with a cup of Cider at Starbucks...maybe call Casey's dad and update him on the pet communicator... then swing by Target to get Harry a travel potty seat. He's still very focused on his duties.

Bailey was here.

Wow. What a day for me.
...

I suppose all tears are not bad. At least, not the productive ones.

First there was Laguna Beach. Season Finale. Everyone headed off to their new lives. Brought back a few memories.

Last their was The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants. I'm at a hotel. I watch movies. That was all I was in the mood for. Bailey is a little girl in the movie. She died of leukemia. They write Bailey was here on the pants. Seeing that really upset me. I feel like I failed Bailey.

I learned today that I at least feel like I failed my two other dogs. Shannon and Taffy. My dad "took Taffy to the vet" my freshman year in college. She was probably 17. I wasn't even there to say good-bye. Shannon went to live with Kevin's parents after living with me for only a short time. I still visited, but still..I failed them both. Sure, it couldn't be helped, but is that really an excuse? I don't think it is. At least, hopefully, I still have a shot at redemption- or at the very least clearing my sinuses. Okay, I guess I have a bit of Chandler Bing in my personality as well. (the making light of things thing).

At this point, most of you probably have no clue what I am talking about. Let me explain a little better- after all, it's what you've all been waiting for.

Today was animal communication day.

Here is the link:

http://yourhealingjourney.com/

Of course there's a link.

Bailey and I spoke with Diana Hunter for an hour. It was a little bit difficult because the cleaning people were there, and we had to keep moving from room to room to get away from them. Having people in the house also stressed Bailey a little. But, I think the session was successful. I know most of you are skeptics, so I don't actually feel like telling the whole story. Helping Bailey feel better is what is important, and we called to the elements to assist, along with Pan, Athena and a few others. At the very least, it helped Bailey poop. Diana said she was constipated ( I think she actually was- less mess in the yard) and that was fixed by the end of the call. The real verdict was that she is also mildly depressed. It's true. She is. I have thought so in the past and was neglecting the fact. She also misses her friendship with Kevin. She also misses "mom." Since she was 7 weeks old when she left her birth mom, I can only assume that she is referring to my mom, who she spent a considerable amount of time with after Harry was born, and was always crushed when she left. But I guess it could be her mom...maybe she wants to move to the country and hunt? Regardless, It sounds like, most importantly, ...Harry doesn't pay enough attention to her! GRRRR!!! THAT was unexpected! Can you believe it??? How do I fix that?!

Well, I thought a bit more about it. I think we exclude her from a lot of Harry activities. Harry is the cool new kid. Maybe Bailey may or may not have disliked him at first, but perhaps if she were best buds with the new kid, life would be sunnier. So, the plan is to include Bailey in more Harry activities, like bedtime.

Her wings are also stiff. I suspect it is neck tension. Perhaps some massage so her astral spirit can soar.

Okay, naysayers, any better suggestions to make my best friend happy? Then be quiet! If Bailey is happy, everyone is happy. And I will not be one of those people that ditches their pup because someone better came along. I am just not like that.

I also need her ears in the house.

Had some time to kill so I thought I'd update the ol' baby book with a little info from BabyCenter.com

New this month: Tantrum triggers
New?

Some days it may seem as though the littlest things set your toddler off. You serve his morning milk in the "wrong" cup and he throws it at you.

Maybe that is why the Lynches can bear witness to Harry tossing his yogurt and sandwich through the air on Saturday. Bad Dora tray! Bad!

Or he wants to go barefoot, even though it's raining outside, and screams his head off when you insist on putting on his boots.

Carry the boots with ya. They'll figure it our when they get cold.

What's going on? Sometimes the triggers will be more obvious than others. He may be tired or angry. Or he may be frustrated by his inability to complete a task that he is determined to do, like putting a round peg in a square hole.

What you can do
Tantrums tend to occur at the worst possible time for you. It seems like when your toddler blows a fuse you're either in a hurry to get out the door in the morning, at the grocery store with half the shopping done, or in the waiting room of the doctor's office.

Ah! People are just too uptight. Allow extra time.

What do these situations have in common? They are times that a typical toddler might feel emotional overload, and like he doesn't have your full attention. If you are aware of the situations that trigger tantrums, you may be able to prevent many of them with minor adjustments or a little advance planning. Get out of bed 15 minutes earlier in the morning so you're not rushing around the house.

Duh!

If you must grocery shop with your child, do it when he is well rested and fed. Carry a favorite book or stuffed animal to doctor visits — anything you can do to keep him calm will help. Also remember that the occasional tantrum is a normal byproduct of toddlerhood and development.

Other developments: Learning how to share, comfort objects
There is no "yours" in a toddler's vocabulary — everything is "mine!" So your car keys,

Oh, I didn't realize that. Hmmm...That explains a lot.

a sibling's beloved stuffed dog, his dad's boots, the slide at the local playground — all these things are, in the eyes of an 18-month-old, his. You can help your child understand what sharing means by praising him when he does give a toy to another child or lets another toddler go down the slide first.

Always! (As far as I know).

When reading a book or watching a video, point out examples of sharing. Try to avoid scolding him when he doesn't want to; sometimes just acknowledging how difficult sharing is will make him more willing to do so. You will have to be patient, and take comfort in the knowledge that other parents of toddlers are going through the same thing.

For a toddler, a favorite stuffed toy is a great source of comfort. He might also have some habits that soothe him — like twirling his hair, rocking, or sucking his thumb. Most children naturally outgrow these behaviors by the time they're 4, so there's probably no need for you to intervene now.

Harry has Snoedel, but that is just for nighttime. Snoedel suffers from chronic fatigue syndrome, so he is only allowed out of the crib for short periods of time. I distinctly remember being told by my parents that the police would arrest them if I were on the boardwalk in my stroller after 8PM. Even as a 2 1/2 year old, this seemed odd to me. I vowed right then to not lie to people, especially my children. I have always had trouble when people ask me if they look fat or their new hair cut suits them. (You may have noticed). Maybe that is why? But with Harry, well, I guess I have just learned to get better at it! -No, wait. I am not lying. I am fake-believing! I am teaching him to use his imagination, as I do with mine! Yeah---I'm sure this one won't come back and kick me in the tush when he's 15.

Just a quick post before I run off to the gym to run off stuff..
Another long weekend, and one that involved too much sugar!
It left me feeling kind of gross and icky, so I need to sweat some of it out.
Harry already felt kind of gross and icky. Friday morning he threw up on Snoedel! Horrors! Especially because after throwing up, all he wanted was Snoedel! Bt he was a trooper.
And he was a trooper all weekend. He was home Friday for Veteran's Day. I took him to gym and he played a bit. I tried to keep him vertical (no monkey flips). Kevin took him to his second hockey game. We decided at least if he went to the game he would sit still and maybe feel better. He chilled with Kevin's sunglasses on behind the goal. He fell asleep on the way to Lola's party, but eventually woke up and hung out with Lance. More gym on Saturday and a visit from the Lynches with baby Tyler. Harry was intrigued by the little one, but not too intrigued to make it to bed on time at 7:30. Sunday we headed up to Jersey for cousin Dominic's 5th birthday. It was at the Funplex. I swore I woudl not let my child play video games, but I think Harry was born with some techno gene. I suspect my hands are tied.

Shoes.

At long last, Harry's missing orange/brown/yellow sandal was located. It had gone missing sometime before the move. He captured it and put it on his foot, over his socks. I found the mirror image twin in the closet, where it had been placed for safe keeping, in hopes of a reunion. Harry padded around for a few minutes, but soon tired of the shoes. Fickle. I took them off and handed him the set, asking him to put them in his room. They didn't quite make it. Instead, they ended up next to his bedroom door, side by side- right on top of my own sneakers!

Beagles, Beagles Everywhere!

Blue skies and mid-seventies this weekend. We made it back to our old stomping grounds at Great Falls. Harry got to walk on crunchy leaves, gather lots of different sticks and get his first real glimpse of the rare geological occurance that is Great Falls. We also saw no less than 10 beagles while there. And 2 or 3 more on the way home!

We also got to see little Arwen on Saturday, play with freinds at The Little Gym, swing on swings at the park and hoola hoop and jump rope with the neighborhood kids in the Cul-de-sac. And that was just Saturday. Today we took it easy. Long walk to St. Elmo's. Trip to the park at Mt. Vernon Elementary, and a trip to REI to get some cool Merrell Mocs and a warm but lightweight fleece that lets Harry be Harry and not just another puffy jacket with a face!

Things Harry likes this week:
1. Lemonade
2. Walking Bailey on her leash
3. Playing with other kids
4. Going to the park
5. Long walks in the Baby Jogger

Things I like:
1. When Harry runs into my arms with a big smile on his face at gym class
2. Watching Harry's confidence increase as he goes off to play with the big kids
3. Listening to Harry learn new words
4. Watching Harry sleep sideays in his crib ( he doesn't still fit), in his little striped blanket sleeper
5. Harry's expressions, especially when he is playing "Monkey See, Monkey Do"

By the way, Harry PEED on the potty tonight! He was actually fighting me for the toilet. Who knew he meant business???

Wosrt part of today: Some very rude woman at St. Elmo's saw Harry opening a free newspaper box door and "affectionately" commented "Aw, how cute! You're teaching him vandalism early!" Feedback please: any chance this could have been meant in a nice way? I am trying to leave it "outside of my circle" but it was annoying.

1. Vandalism is not really something a parent would teach.
2. He wasn't vandalising anytging
3. I can't leave it out of my circle
4. I didn't say anything back---because I didn't want to seem like a sensitive, argumentative person. It really is a fine line.
5. Why would anyone say such a rude thing? St. Elmo's people suck! Why do we ever go there?

One thing that made me feel better: watching Desperate Housewives. Felicity Huffman's character's colleagues were so rude to her about her suits. What is wrong with people?

I really have to leave it outside of the circle!

Domestic Matters

After months of unanswered calls from Terminex and 1 well worded letter to the Better Business Bureau, and several letters from them telling me they were forwarding my concerns to various offices, I received 3 calls from Terminex in teh past 24 hours apologizing for any problems and asking if there was any way they could assist me. My balance is now $0, so no, I am perfectly well assisted. Thank you BBB!

Terminex appeared at my house one day after I cancelled them and without calling first. Since we were moving, and since I cancelled service, I didn't think I should have to pay. I usually just write a check anyway, but I held firm on this one. Next time, I will try Orkin.

I will be writing a check to one Ms. Diana Hunter, Wiccan, Animal Communicator and Shaman. Gotta stop this digging. And the crying! It is incessant, both Bailey's and ours. Thanks to Bailey, Harry is growing up in a very tense household. I plan to rememdy that on November 15. I will let you know how it goes! I don't want to be one of those people that ditches there dog after a baby is born. I really don't. Plus, I need the extra pair of ears.

Happy Samhain!...and some talk about pain being temporary...

Pronounced "sow-in," Samhain is the time during which life and death walk hand in hand. On this day, the veil that separates the worlds (our plane of living and the plane of the dead) is at its thinnest. Many things are possible on this holiday. The God has arrived at the edge of live and is conceived as a seed that will be reborn soon. The Goddess in the form of the Crone rules, teaching us lessons and allowing our ancestors to guide us.

Samhain is one of the most maligned and least understood holidays. Contrary to the modern media images of Satanic worship and animal sacrifice, Wiccans believe that this is a time to remember and honor those who have gone before us.

Many of our current day Halloween activities are taken from this holiday. The jack-o-lanterns that we carve and place outside are evolutions of the ancient practice of leaving candles in windows to guide the dead to the underworld. Handing out candy to children was gleamed from the practice of leaving food out to nourish ancestors as they traveled the path to the underworld.

Since the veil is indeed thin, this is the ideal holiday to contact ancestors and initiate communication. Because it is the Wiccan "new year" it is also a time to cut away practices and behaviors that inhibit our growth, and the Crone is present to assist in removing that which is unhealthy from our lives. It is also a time to plan for the future through divination practices. Appropriate rituals include contacting ancestors within sacred circle, honoring the lives of those who have gone before us, releasing destructive habits, divination activities, and all transformation rituals.

New year, new you. Or, new me. Concerning my running endeavors, let's just say this is a "rebuilding year". AFter 7 years of running, I think I surpassed my first marathon time by possibly 3 minutes. The MCM XXX was about 75 minutes worse then my best marathon time in 2001. Before the race, there was a Tylenol ad in the program that read "Pain is Temporary, Quitting is Forever." That kept me going. That, my curiously clear lungs and sinuses, my almost back in shape legs and back, the blue skies above and my fabulous friends and family.

This race was CROWDED. An extra 10,000 people this year. 30,000 signed up, and 28,000+ ran. This meant that the first 5 miles were slow going. Tara, Meghan and I did our best to maintain about a 12 minute pace. It was hard to go any faster, and we had to weave around folks just to do that. Even though my first race was with a run/walk group, in this size crowd, I have to admit this years groups were rather annoying. They would yell "walk!" and stop dead in front of you. Bad. But that's okay.

It seemed all uphill until Key Bridge. We saw Kristie Greco and her roommate Jamie at mile 2. They took our coats (and pom poms!). By the time we got to Georgetown, Meghan broke out ahead of us. It was a good spot for that. The streets got wider. It seemed like it wasn't as crowded this year...but maybe that was because our start time was 50 minutes after the first gun went off.

We ran into Tara's dad as we were leaving M Street. Then we carried on. I kept looking for Andrew in his red Phillies cap, but I couldn't find him, even though he apparently crossed the finish line after me and somewhere along the lines, based on Adria's online tracking, he passed us. Maybe it was during a bathroom break? I stopped four times to pee. That's a time killer. I think there were more water and powerade stations this year.

We saw Alyssa before Rock Creek. We kept looking for Jill and other seemommyrunners. I Gu'd up every hour, on the hour. I think the sugars did wonders for my legs. Not so great on my stomach though. But like I said, my nose and lungs felt great, so that was cool. It was at about this point that I set my brain to "do it better next time." I'm still a cheerleader at heart, and I can even motivate myself at times.

Things were getting tough around mile 12. That was basically my longest training run, so I can understand why. I was trying to wave Tara on, but to no avail. She said we'd run together. SO that meant I had to keep going. At that moment, we looked up and saw the greatest thing ever: a gigantose professionally made sign from Sully and Aidan! I remembered Aidan doing a spell check about a week prior, but I thought they were just pulling out the sharpies! The sign was awesome, and we sprinted at least a block up to it. SUlly and Aidan were there with Kevin, Harry, StinkyInky, Lola, Lance and Dave's friend Dave's two sons from Juneau, Alaska. There were Bloody Mary's (I had 2 sips) and oranges and muffins. Harry started crying when he saw me, so I got to hug him. I missed hugging Kevin, but got another chance about a mile ahead. Kevin and Harry pulled up with the baby jogger while we were at a corner receiving first aid (lip balm for my arm) from Jamie and Kristie.

Saw some of Tara's friends a little bit further, and then her mom. Stopped to pee and stretch at Mile 15, then headed to Haines Point. UGH! Quiet. Boring. We ran alone at this point. The only sounds were people worried about "The Bridge." This is the 14th Street Bridge, where if you don't cross it by a certain time, the bus comes to pick you up. However, a friend, Ahram, hopped on the bus in 2001...and they give you lunch! That was sounding good, but I new we didn't need to worry about the bus.

So, I took some candy from strangers, some Tylenol from the Marines and left Haines Point for The Bridge. The Bridge is concrete. I messed up my sciatic nerve running on concrete in early 2000 or 2001 at the GW Parkway Classic, so I decided the smart thing was to do a walk break. I can also justify nearly anything. But I still heard the echo of "Quitting is Forever" so I trudged on. I called Kevin to tell him I passed the 20 mile mark. Then I hung up. Couldn't talk.

Post bridge, Paul Murray yelled my name, so I chatted for a second and then kept going. Running again. The course looped through Crystal City around 22-24, so I saw Tara again and yelled for her.
I was strating to hurt though. My arches hurt a little, but my spirit hurt more. The negative talk really got going. My breathing stopped. The way home seemed closer than the finish line. But I trudged on, not making eye contact for fear someone would yell my name and I would cry.

I took a call from Konnie. Chatted about work. Then I saw Paul and his Navy Federal gang so I ran to catch up. He offered to run, and while I was pretty unhappy at that point, I accepted the offer, figuring it was the only way to get myself done quickly. We ran to Joan Jett, both on stereo and Karaoke style for about 2 miles. Before I knew it, it was mile 26. Paul was asked to leave the course since he didn't have a bib. I thanked him and sprinted, slowly, up the hill. 200 yards. 80 feet. I knew the course, so I paced myself. The course changed. Finish line was closer. I sprinted across it, then nearly burst into tears, so happy to be DONE!!!

I foudn Kevin and Meg and Harry a few yards away.Happy to see them. Harry was thrilled to see me. He'd been a good boy all day. He earned a medal, so he put it on, grabbed my bottle of water and shared the rest of my Cliff Bar.

Tara finished about 15 minutes ahead of me. Andrew wasn't sure of his time. Meghan did great! I think I finished in the middle of the seemommyrun pack. Jill finished well after me, but apparently her friend Amy was part of a collision at Mile 2---but they made it to the end anyway.

I feel great now. No real aches and pains, but I suspect I may lose the right toenail. I do have a gash in my left side. I think it was from the cellphone band I wore until Mile 13. Oh well. I am ready for the next one. Dublin 2010? Or maybe another MCM so that this time I can actually finish ahead of Kermi (he passed me with Miss Piggy, a new entry, at Mile 13) and the juggler (who dropped his balls after passing me on the bridge).

I am so greatful I have the world's best husband and the greatest friends on the planet...and a very understanding little boy, who did his best to figure out why mommy ran right past him.

But, Harry got to enjoy a day of his own on the 31st. He stayed home from school and went for a bike ride to the bagel place where we got to spend some more time with Aunt Meg. Grandmom came over shortly after, and we also got to see Tara again. We played around the house all afternoon, "talking on the phone" and practicing jumping. Lance came over at 5 and we were all set for the Halloween Parade.

The Hart's, the peopel we bought our house from, appeared right before we headed over. They brought their little chicken, Eve. She was the cutest! The Monkey and the Pirate followed and we headed to Quincy Avenue/Road/ Street were the parade started. By the time we winded down Monroe, we ran into Tara and some neighbors we knew, Belinda, Anita & Tres & their family, William's family, the people who held Oktoberfest, and a bunch of others. Everyone was taking pictures, and it looked like one of the scenes from ET or Mr. Mom when all of the kids are out Trick or Treating. I always wanted to be a part of that!

Harry got some special treats from Anita next door. He actually walked up to their house himself, quickly figuring things out. We then went to the first house across the street. Harry proceeded to step inside and close the door---with Mommy, Lance and Lola on the outside! Luckily, everyone thought it was funny and we moved on. We stuck to 6 houses on the Cul-de-sac, and Lanec and Harry quit to indulge in some fruit snacks. Good thing we'd already met the people who had supplied the treats!

Harry was happy to carry his embroidered pumpkin "purse" from Aunt Toni. Luckily, he has been practicing the purse carrying, so it came in handy. He can also count to 1 (3 actually, but he actually says "one"), so some of the time he took only 1 candy, and even put it in his bag (some of the time). He had a blast, but by 6:39 wanted to do nothing more than sleep...which he did for the next 12 hours without a sound, waking up to find toys that our dearly departed had left for him (from Pier 1) on their way to the Underworld.

Happy Samhain.

The First Step is Admitting You Have a Problem

A chosen few of you may know that I have a Hanson CD. I went to the store and bought it with my own money. I admit it. But, I couldn't get Mmm Bop out of my head. The only way to destroy it was to buy the CD and play it until I knew every word. It worked. Once I figured it all out, my head stopped torturing me.

These days, it can be worse. Mmm Bop had a good beat, and thanks to Kevin, it actually turned up on my Ipod SHuffle. Thank you Muffin! What a great day that was! These days I sometiems find myself dancing aroudn the house, or worse, the airport, to Mary Had a Little Lamb.

I am almost ashamed to admit what happened today. I am documenting this only because I am hoping there is someone out there who can help me. I have been on a Billy Idol kick lately (and NO that is not the problem). The problem is, today White Wedding came on the radio. If you don't know the song, here are the lyrics:


"White Wedding"

Hey little sister what have you done
Hey little sister who's the only one
Hey little sister who's your superman
Hey little sister who's the one you want
Hey little sister shot gun!

It's a nice day to start again
It's a nice day for a white wedding
It's a nice day to start again.

Hey little sister who is your with
Hey little sister what's your vice and wish?
Hey little sister shot gun (oh yeah)
Hey little sister who's your superman
Hey little sister shot gun!

It's a nice day to start again (come on)
It's a nice day for a white wedding
It's a nice day to start again.

(Pick it up)

Take me back home

Hey little sister what have you done
Hey little sister who's the only one
I've been away for so long (so long)
I've been away for so long (so long)
I let you go for so long

It's a nice day to start again (come on)
It's a nice day for a white wedding
It's a nice day to start again.

There is nothin' fair in this world
There is nothin' safe in this world
And there's nothin' sure in this world
And there's nothin' pure in this world
Look for something left in this world
Start again

Come on
It's a nice day for a white wedding
It's a nice day to start again.
It's a nice day for a white wedding
It's a nice day to start again

I am happily singing along in the kitchen when BAM! out of nowhere- Baby Bear from Sesame Street is the visual! AND the audio! Grrrr!

Blah! I hate reporters! When will I learn? It's a cute article,and it is positive, but they always seem to really miss the boat! On the bright side, I don't look too fat in the photo...

Grabbing Life by the Baby Jogger

Grrr! I'm so stuck on this now!

I am in North Carolina until Thursday, so I cannot get a copy of the Post. I have to drop my computer off with IT in ten minutes.

Grrr!!!!

Like I said, the article is reasonably positive, but I AM NOT A STAY AT HOME MOM!!!! Not everyone in the group is. It's not a group for STAY AT HOME MOMS!!! And no offense to any stay at home moms...I just feel that I would have trained better if I was!!!! And I wouldn't have felt guily about leaving Harry JUST for my runs. Or we could have run during the week. I don't know why this is suddenly getting to me. Stupid repoorter. Stupid reporter. STUPID REPORTER!

I don't have feelings of guilt regarding working, but adding this extra 26.2 component was a lot...and that STUPID F^%&ING ARTICLE did not account for any of it! THE POST FUCKING SUCKS!"